Snow day...

Day 4...Lupron, Dexamethasone, Prenatal, BCP...only 1 more day of BCP!!!

It looks like we're getting a snow day tomorrow!  Well, that is if the weatherman is right!  They are saying 6-10 inches!  Woohoo!  DS won't be happy if he can't go out and play in the snow but if he doesn't stop coughing he's staying in!  DH and I have both been sick with this horrible cough and now DS has it...Its driving me crazy...I hate to hear him cough...he has a tiny bit of asthma so it freaks me out when he coughs so much.  I've got him taking cough medicine...the humidifier is going and we've used the inhaler so I'm hoping it eases up!

Hoping to enjoy the day tomorrow!

Awesome weekend...

Day 3...Lupron, Dexamethasone, Prenatal, BCP!

Only 2 days of BCP left!  Just 1 week before my first u/s and b/w!  Yay!

So it was a great weekend!  We went to the Thunder/Heat game with my sister and bil!  I love hanging out with them.  We always have fun!  Yesterday was a beautiful 70 degrees...today it was more like 40...by tomorrow night it will be snowing and by Tuesday we are supposed to have 6-10 inches!  So hopefully we will get a snow day and get to be lazy on Tuesday!  I'm ready to play in the snow!  Then next weekend we have UFC fights Saturday night and then my Steelers are going to whoop the Packers in the Superbowl on Sunday!  I'm totally stoked!  Can't wait!!!!

72 and counting...

Seventy-two months that is....that's how many months we've been TTC #2!  In the past seventy-two months I have seen 3 different REs...3 months of Clomid...5 failed IUIs...1 chemical pregnancy...countless hours sitting in waiting rooms...too many u/s to count...tons of blood work...1 IVF cycle...1 m/c at 11 weeks...and so much more.  But on the 6 year anniversary of TTC I'm doing my FET and I am very hopeful that it wasn't all for nothing...It has been so hard, physically and emotionally but I'm stronger b/c of it.  I will love this baby more b/c of all I have been through.  So as much as it hurts I know its for a reason.  I've had 6 years to spend with my DS...I will never have regrets about having another baby too soon and taking that time away from him...I know I've given him all I can and he will never feel like he isn't #1 in my life.  When/if we do have another baby it will be the baby we were meant to have.  That baby will change our lives just like DS changed our lives. 

Day 2...Lupron, Dexamethasone, Prenatal, BCP!

Getting up at 7am on a Saturday to do an injection sucks...its kind of hard to go back to sleep after all that!  I got back to sleep ok tho...the Dex causes insomnia so if I'm up for too long its game over!  So I've got to get it done and get back in bed!  I had a dream last night that I POAS and it was blazing BFP!!  Then I freaked out b/c I hadn't even had my FET yet...lol..I take that as a sign that someone in my TWW group needs to POAS b/c it will be blazing! 

I love that there is somewhere I can go and talk to other women who can relate to what I'm going through.  I can't imagine going through this whole process without TWW.com!  Its amazing to have so much support...it doesn't matter if you have good news or bad...there is always someone there to help you celebrate or make you feel better!  I love it!!!

And it begins...

Day 1...Lupron injection, dexamethasone, prenatal and bcp!

I'm so excited to finally get started.  I feel like it has taken forever to get here...it felt like that with my fresh cycle but once I got started it just flew by! 

Well...I have to gush about my DH for a moment.  Little back story about how we met...we went to the same HS.  He graduated with my sister 2 years before me.  We're from a small town so I've always known him but we didn't really hang out in the same circles.  After I graduated HS I had planned on going out with my sister and her boyfriend (not her husband) and a few friends...well my DH was there...we were the only singles there (later found out it was a total set up)...long story short we've been together every since!  Just 6 months after we started dating I found out I was pregnant...shocked doesn't even describe how we felt...but it was a good shocked.  As soon as I told DH he asked me to marry him!  It was all happening so fast that we didn't know when to actually get married...so at 8 1/2 months along I decided we had to get married before I had DS...I freaked at the thought of me not having his last name and then I was terrified we would never find the time...so I planned our quiet/backyard wedding in just 5 days!  It was small and just close family and it was beautiful!  I wouldn't trade it for the world!  Exactly 2 weeks after we got married we welcomed DS.  He is just so perfect for me.  Even on our bad days we still don't really fight...we get annoyed with each other and get mad but we never go to bed mad...we always talk it out.  We also work together, we have for over a year.  Everyone thinks we are crazy but people we work with are amazed at how well we work together...we bicker and I fire him daily (he is actually my supervisor)  but at the end of the day we get the job done and don't stress about work.  I know I'm rambling but I just feel like I need to get my feelings out...idk...I'm a dork...I just flippin love my husband.  We have been together for 8 1/2 years and married for 7 1/2 years!!  Thats just crazy...although sometimes it feels like we've been together for 20 years!  Its amazing to think this is the man I am spending the rest of my life with...the man I will grow old with...I get all teary just thinking about it...oh I just love him!

Ok...I'm done with all the mush!  I just love my life! 

Tomorrow it all begins!!

I start Lupron tomorrow!!  I also have to start dexamethasone which sucks...it gives me the munchies!  So that 15 pounds I've lost will just come right back!  Oh well...b/c at the end of all this I hope to be knocked up so a little extra weight won't be noticed in a few months!  Or the weight will be noticed just not in a "wow she got fat" kind of way and more of a "look at that cute bump" kind of way! 

So...total change of subject...I LOVE American Idol and I must say I'm super excited about Steven Tyler and J Lo as judges...I must admit...I have a little bit of a crush on Steven Tyler! 

What am I going to do with him?

So, my oh so adorable DS is so funny.  He isn't your regular 7 year old.  He is honestly the best kid ever.  I don't know how I got so lucky!  He is so laid back, sweet, funny...just an awesome kid!  Earlier this month he lost his first tooth.  It wasn't easy...it had been loose for over a month and once it got REALLY lose he didn't want to mess with it anymore.  So every day I would ask him to wiggle it...he got so annoyed with me but he really needed to get it out b/c the other tooth was coming in...I've never dealt with a loose tooth so I had no idea what to do or how long to let it go...so I bugged him about it.  It finally got to the point I told him we were going to the dentist...long story short...the dentist pulled his tooth.  He was such a trooper tho and did great!  Since then he has told me he won't tell me if he ever has another loose tooth b/c I bugged him so much the last time.  So of course it makes me feel bad!  I want him to tell me and be excited.  So today he stayed home sick with DH...I get home and DH tells me that DS showed him a new loose tooth and told him "Don't tell Mommy, you know how she acted last time!"  He is such a mess!  I'm sure he will fess up in the next few days but its hilarious that he is holding such a grudge about it!  I guess he has to learn sooner or later that's what Moms are for! 

Oh no...

I'm so emotional...already?  I'm blaming it on the BCP...I've been on them 2 months and I only have 6 days left!!  Thank goodness! 

I just feel like crying!  Over everything...over nothing...I'm so excited about my FET but I'm sad that I'm even having to do it.  I should be picking names...nursery colors...I should be enrolling in birthing classes...planning a baby shower.  But I'm not.  I'm picking up prescriptions...planning my calendar for the next month so I can do it all again.   Even if I the FET works I still won't be able to be happy...then I have to worry about the first u/s...the 2nd u/s...is there a hb...then making it to 12 weeks...and then...it won't end...I just wish I could POAS...see 2 lines and be excited to know I'd be bringing home a baby in 9 months....Infertility SUCKS!! 

I wondered when that would happen...

I went to the pharmacy today to pick up my PIO and estrogen...before I got there I remembered I would be a few BCPs short and my prenatals will be out soon so I called and had those refilled also.  So when I pick up all my meds the tech sd the Pharmacist wanted to talk to me.  I've been going to this pharmacy for 5 years, all the techs and Pharmacist know me well so I didn't think too much of it...so she says "Um, Kortney...you do know you are taking BCP and PIO and estrogen are used for reproduction?"  I laughed and told her I was doing a FET...the worried look on her face went away.  Not sure what she thought I was doing but she seemed relieved to know it was legit! 

Only 4 more days and I start Lupron and Dexamethasone!!!  I just have about a week of BCP!  Its all starting to happen!!  Woohoo!!

This is what all the excitement is about....

Who knew?  Who knew I'd be so excited about jabbing myself countless times with needles over the next month...It actually isn't as bad as it sounds.  I did the math with my fresh cycle...it was around 100 injections in 6 weeks.  I will have to double up on progesterone so that means 2 injections in my a$$ a day!  Those are no fun!  My FET will end up with about 200 injections when its all said and done..that is if I get my BFP...

Lupron and my needles...there will be 25 injections of this one...

Progesterone injections...if I get a BFP and will end up doing about 140 of these...YIKES!

and this is my calendar...all of the color coating is a different injection or pill I have to take that day...once I know when my FET will be I will get an updated calendar...

I'm excited to share my journey and hopefully help other women who are stuggling with infertility!

My first blog ever...

So...I'm new to blogging but I wanted to share my journey.  I start my Lupron injections in 5 days!  I'm excited and nervous to get started.  I know the FET will be less stressful that the fresh IVF cycle but there is still so much to worry about.  I'm going to do as much as possible to "de-stress" and not think about it too much!  We'll see how long that lasts!